Piece of Reminiscence

Hi. I always come back here everytime things got harder in life. I wonder why, talking to myself like this is more comfortable than sharing with others. I used to share everything, and I still do even now to the closest one. But now, I think everything just got harder and harder. Managing my own mood and my professionality is somehow so hard. My mood swing is getting worse day by day and maybe if my principal finds out this she might send me to the nearest hospital and tell me to consult to the psychiatrist. lmao. I don't have any motivation in life and I hate waking up in the morning and sleeping at night. Can you even imagine that?

I am still wondering, things got harder for me because I made it myself. I am a selfish-jerk and everyone seem get tired of me too easily. I tried so hard to maintain relationship with everyone but I end up walking away by my ownself and this introvert side of me was totally disturbing. ugh. I am so tired of being this kind of creature.

I've gone crazy much recently and I think I should not do that in the first place. I know everything is not work already eventhough I cried so hard about this but I still insist to do that. The result is pretty much hurting and I think I was careful enough not being hurt anymore. sigh. I always tell my self that being in love is painful and too troublesome. But I always fall into one. You see, got your heart broken for multiple times is not really good, I should not be in love.

FRIENDLY REMINDER SELF, STOP BEING IN LOVE!